Frankenstein : one of the finest motivational stories I have read

Clarence M. Jones told how encouragement and making faults seem easy to correct completely changed the life of his son.

“In 1970 my son David, who was then fifteen years old, came to live with me in Cincinnati. He had led a rough life. In 1958 his head was cut open in a car accident, leaving a very bad scar on his forehead.

In 1960 his mother and I were divorced and he moved to Dallas, Texas, with his mother. Until he was fifteen he had spent most of his school years in special classes for slow learners in the Dallas school system. Possibly because of the scar, school administrators had decided he was brain-injured and could not function at a normal level. He was two years behind his age group, so he was only in the seventh grade. Yet he did not know his multiplication tables, added on his fingers and could barely read.

“There was one positive point. He loved to work on radio and TV sets. He wanted to become a TV technician. I encouraged this and pointed out that he needed maths to qualify for the training. I decided to help him become proficient in this subject. We obtained four sets

of flash cards: multiplication, division, addition and subtraction.

As we went through the cards, we put the correct answers in a discard stack. When David missed one, I gave him the correct answer and then put the card in the repeat stack until there were no cards left. I made a big deal out of each card he got right, particularly if he had missed it previously. Each night we would go through the repeat stack until there were no cards left.

Each night we timed the exercise with a stop watch. I promised him that when he could get all the cards correct in eight minutes with no incorrect answers, we would quit doing it every night. This seemed an impossible goal to David. The first night it took 52 minutes, the second night, 48, then 45, 44, 41 then under 40 minutes.

We celebrated each reduction. I’d call in my wife, and we would both hug him and we’d all dance a jig. At the end of the month he was doing all the cards perfectly in less than eight minutes. When he made a small improvement he would ask to do it again. He had made the fantastic discovery that learning was easy and fun.

“Naturally his grades in algebra took a jump. It is amazing how much easier algebra is when you can multiply. He astonished himself by bringing home a B in math. That had never happened before. Other changes came with almost unbelievable rapidity. His reading improved rapidly, and he began to use his natural talents in drawing.

Later in the school year his science teacher assigned him to develop an exhibit. He chose to develop a highly complex series of models to demonstrate the effect of levers. It required skill not only in drawing and model making but in applied mathematics. The exhibit took first prize in his school’s science fair and was entered in the city competition and won third prize for the

entire city of Cincinnati.

“That did it. Here was a kid who had flunked two grades, who had been told he was ‘brain-damaged,’ who had been called ‘Frankenstein’ by his classmates and told his brains must have leaked out of the cut on his head. Suddenly he discovered he could really learn and accomplish things. The result? From the last quarter of the eighth grade all the way through high school, he

never failed to make the honor roll; in high school he was elected to the national honor society.

Once he found learning was easy, his whole life changed.” If you want to help others to improve, remember . . .

Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.

Changing people or transforming them

Some of my recent learning and believe:

Talk about changing people. If you and I will inspire the people with whom we come in contact to a realization of the hidden treasures they possess, we can do far more than change people. We can literally transform them.

Exaggeration? Then listen to these sage words from William James, one of the most distinguished psychologists and philosophers America has ever produced:

Compared with what we ought to be, we are only half awake. We are making use of only a small part of our physical and mental resources. Stating the thing broadly, the human individual thus lives far within his limits. He possesses powers of various sorts which he habitually fails to use.

Yes, you who are reading these lines possess powers of various sorts which you habitually fail to use; and one of these powers you are probably not using to the fullest extent is your magic ability to praise people and inspire them with a realization of their latent possibilities.

Abilities wither under criticism; they blossom under encouragement. To become a more effective leader of people, apply . .

"Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement.

Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”

LET THE OTHER PERSON SAVE FACE

Anna Mazzone

Ms. Mazzone, a marketing specialist for a food packer, was given her first major assignment - the test-marketing of a new product.

She told the class:

“When the results of the test came in, I was devastated. I had made a serious error in my planning, and the entire test had to be done all over again.

To make this worse, I had no time to discuss it with my boss before the meeting in which I was to make my report on the project. When I was called on to give the report, I was shaking with fright. I had all I could do to keep from breaking down, but I resolved I would not cry and have all those men make remarks about women not being able to handle a management job because they are too emotional.

I made my report briefly and stated that due to an error I would repeat the study before the next meeting. I sat down, expecting my boss to blow up.

“Instead, he thanked me for my work and remarked that it was not unusual for a person to make an error on a new project and that he had confidence that the repeat survey would be accurate and meaningful to the company.

He Assured me, in front of all my colleagues, that he had faith in me and I knew I had done my best, and that my lack of experience, not my lack of ability, was the reason for the failure.

I left that meeting with my head in the air and with the determination that I would never let that boss of mine down again.”

The Letter I love

I am printing the letter here because it shows how Lincoln tried to change an obstreperous general when the very fate of the nation could have depended upon the general’s action.You will know why I would love it, while you would finish reading.

This is perhaps the sharpest letter Abe Lincoln wrote after he became President; yet you will note that he

praised General Hooker before he spoke of his grave faults.

Yes, they were grave faults, but Lincoln didn’t call them that. Lincoln was more conservative, more diplomatic.Lincoln wrote: “There are some things in regard to which I am not quite satisfied with you.” Talk about tact! And diplomacy!

Here is the letter addressed to General Hooker:

I have placed you at the head of the Army of the Potomac. Of course, I have done this upon what appears to me to be sufficient reasons, and yet I think it best for you to know that there are some things in regard to which I am not quite satisfied with you.

I believe you to be a brave and skillful soldier, which, of course, I like. I also believe you do not mix politics with your profession, in which you are right. You have confidence in yourself, which is a valuable if not an indispensable quality.

You are ambitious, which, within reasonable bounds, does good rather than harm, But I think that during General Burnside’s command of the army you have taken counsel of your ambition and thwarted him as much as you could, in which you did a great wrong to the country and to a most meritorious and honourable brother officer.

I have heard, in such a way as to believe it, of your recently saying that both the army and the Government needed a dictator. Of course, it was not for this, but in spite of it, that I have given you command.Only those generals who gain successes can set up as dictators. What I now ask of you is military success and I will risk the dictatorship.

The Government will support you to the utmost of its ability, which is neither more nor less than it has done and will do for all commanders. I much fear that the spirit which you have aided to infuse into the army, of criticizing their commander and withholding confidence from him, will now turn upon you. I shall assist you, as far as I can, to put it down.

Neither you nor Napoleon, if he were alive again, could get any good out of an army while such spirit prevails in it, and now beware of rashness. Beware of rashness, but with energy and sleepless vigilance go forward and give us victories.

THE VALUE OF A SMILE AT CHRISTMAS

It costs nothing, but creates much.

It enriches those who receive, without impoverishing those who give.

It happens in a flash and the memory of it sometimes lasts forever,

None are so rich they can get along without it, and

none so poor but are richer for its benefits.

It creates happiness in the home,

fosters good will in a business,

and is the countersign of friends.

It is rest to the weary, daylight to the discouraged,

sunshine to the sad, and Nature’s best antidote fee trouble.

Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen,

for it is something that is no earthly good to anybody till it is given away.

And if in the last-minute rush of Christmas buying some of

our salespeople should be too tired to give you a smile,

may we ask you to leave one of yours?

For nobody needs a smile so much as those who have none

left to give!

Dad

Intensive-care unit :  that's how I get abbreviation of ICU while I goggled it. I was never admitted there & I hope I never will be. But I saw my dad there for seven days before he died. I can remember how shocked I was when I saw him first time in that hospital's bed as senseless. The only word I said was "Oh My Allah!" 

Life in ICU was really different from my known world. 

At day 1: I saw a patient next to my dad's bed. She was talking and let her family know about her discomfort. I was wishing if my dad could open his eyes for once; just told us what his discomfort; just like the lady next to his bed!

At day 2: I didn't saw that lady ever. She died in the morning! 

In those 7 days, I felt like everyone of my family, my mother, my brother, my sis & me, we lost something apart from my dad. We are never the same person any more.

I never thought I will ever miss my dad the way I am still missing him. I never thought  that I will also like to follow some of my dad's footsteps. I start realizing the worthiness of some of his deeds that I used to see him doing.

I have promised something to myself during that time. And dad, I will fulfill all of those, InsAllah.

I love you and I will love you always.

**This year I again started writing & today is Bangla Noborsho!!! sob bangalike !! 1417 er onek onek suvecha.